150 Things to Do Before You Turn Thirty

My friend tagged me on this list. And though I guess this list was tailored for an american lifestyle, was glad that I had done a couple of things :)… Have 7 more months and a long way to go…

The rules are:
The things you have already done - make them bold.
Blue is for things that you are dying to do!

01. Bought everyone in the bar a drink
02. Swam with dolphins
03. Climbed a mountain
04. Taken a Ferrari for a test drive
05. Been inside the Great Pyramid
06. Held a tarantula
07. Taken a candlelit bath with someone
08. Said “I love you” and meant it
09. Hugged a tree
10. Bungee jumped
11. Visited Paris
12. Watched a lightning storm at sea
13. Stayed up all night long and saw the sun rise
14. Seen the Northern Lights
15. Gone to a huge sports game
16. Walked the stairs to the top of the leaning Tower of Pisa
17. Grown and eaten your own vegetables
18. Touched an iceberg
19. Slept under the stars
20. Changed a baby’s diaper
21. Taken a trip in a hot air balloon
22. Watched a meteor shower
23. Gotten drunk on champagne
24. Given more than you can afford to charity
25. Looked up at the night sky through a telescope
26. Had an uncontrollable giggling fit at the worst possible moment
27. Had a food fight
28. Bet on a winning horse
29. Asked out a stranger
30. Had a snowball fight
31. Screamed as loudly as you possibly can
32. Held a lamb
33. Seen a total eclipse
34. Ridden a roller coaster
35. Hit a home run
36. Danced like a fool and didn’t care who was looking
37. Adopted an accent for an entire day
38. Actually felt happy about your life, even for just a moment
39. Had two hard drives for your computer
40. Visited all 50 states
41. Taken care of someone who was drunk
42. Had amazing friends
43. Danced with a stranger in a foreign country
44. Watched whales
45. Stolen a sign
46. Backpacked in Europe
47. Taken a road-trip
48. Gone rock climbing
49. Taken a midnight walk on the beach
50. Gone sky diving
51. Visited Ireland
52. Been heartbroken longer than you were actually in love
53. In a restaurant, sat at a stranger’s table and had a meal with them
54. Visited Japan
55. Milked a cow
56. Alphabetized your CDs
57. Pretended to be a superhero
58. Sung karaoke
59. Lounged around in bed all day
60. Played touch football
61. Gone scuba diving
62. Kissed in the rain
63. Played in the mud
64. Played in the rain
65. Gone to a drive-in theatre
66. Visited the Great Wall of China
67. Started a business
68. Fallen in love and not had your heart broken
69. Toured ancient sites
70. Taken a martial arts class
71. Played D&D for more than 6 hours straight
72. Gotten married
73. Been in a movie
74. Crashed a party
75. Gotten divorced
76. Gone without food for 5 days
77. Made cookies from scratch
78. Won first prize in a costume contest
79. Ridden a gondola in Venice
80. Gotten a tattoo
81. Rafted the Snake River
82. Been on a television news program as an “expert”
83. Gotten flowers for no reason
84. Performed on stage
85. Been to Las Vegas
86. Recorded music
87. Eaten shark
88. Kissed on the first date
89. Gone to Thailand
90. Bought a house
91. Been in a combat zone
92. Buried one/both of your parents
93. Been on a cruise ship
94. Spoken more than one language fluently
95. Performed in Rocky Horror
96. Raised children
97. Followed your favorite band/singer on tour
98. Passed out cold
99. Taken an exotic bicycle tour in a foreign country
100. Picked up and moved to another city to just start over
101. Walked the Golden Gate Bridge
102. Sang loudly in the car, and didn’t stop when you knew someone was looking with the windows open – not exactly, but almost :)
103. Had plastic surgery
104. Survived an accident that you shouldn’t have survived
105. Wrote articles for a large publication
106. Lost over 100 pounds
107. Held someone while they were having a flashback
108. Piloted an airplane
109. Touched a stingray
110. Broken someone’s heart
111. Helped an animal give birth
112. Won money on a TV game show
113. Broken a bone
114. Gone on an African photo safari
115. Had a facial part pierced other than your ears
116. Fired a rifle, shotgun, or pistol
117. Eaten mushrooms that were gathered in the wild
118. Ridden a horse
119. Had major surgery
120. Had a snake as a pet
121. Hiked to the bottom of the Grand Canyon
122. Slept for 30 hours in a 48 hour period
123. Visited more foreign countries than U.S. States
124. Visited all 7 continents
125. Taken a canoe trip that lasted more than 2 days
126. Eaten kangaroo meat
127. Eaten sushi
128. Had your picture in the newspaper
129. Changed someone’s mind about something you care deeply about
130. Gone back to school
131. Parasailed
132. Touched a cockroach
133. Eaten fried green tomatoes
134. Read The Iliad and The Odyssey
135. Selected one “important” author who you missed in school, and read
136. Killed and prepared an animal for eating
137. Skipped all your school reunions
138. Communicated with someone without sharing a common spoken language
139. Been elected to public office
140. Written your own computer language
141. Thought to yourself that you’re living your dream
142. Had to put someone you love into hospice care
143. Built your own PC from parts
144. Sold your own artwork to someone who didn’t know you
145. Had a booth at a street fair
146. Dyed your hair
147. Been a DJ
148. Shaved your head
149. Caused a car accident
150. Saved someone’s life

Dance like no one's watching...

Most of us have been stuck in transit waiting for connecting trains, planes or buses and spent that time looking around us, observing people as they walk by, picked up a magazine that we dont typically don’t read, paid more attention to whats around. If so, why do we find it hard to apply it back to life.

Its been a week of serious conversations for me, mostly talking to my friends ‘stuck in transit’ in real life, some poised to move on to the next phase, some struggling with issues with the current and looking to hit a fast forward button, some regret missing out on something, wishing they had done things differently…

One of my dearest friends was caught up feeling miserable about the whole process of finding someone and getting married...One wants to switch her jobs badly because she is not happy with it, one is wondering why he left a good job and took up an MBA to graduate at a point when everything looks so bleak.

Somehow we are constantly in pursuit of something… As kids in high school we want to get past the boards and into good colleges. Then it’s about jobs, higher degrees, better jobs, finding the right person and getting married, wanting a home, kids and then we get so buried in our work and kids that we wait for them to get somewhere before we can take a break and do something we have always wanted to do. The present remains mostly an investment for our future, grading ourselves based on our progress..We are unhappy if we are stuck somewhere in this natural progression... To give a sense of the conversation with my friend….

Me: Its not about you…Take it easy, don’t bring it down on urself..
She: No, it’s got to be about me that I am still here; I am investing so much time and energy.

Its in our psyche that we have to be somewhere, have some goals all the time. If not, we are somehow not successful..If we constantly latch onto the next journey the moment we get to a destination ....then, when do we actually sit down and enjoy the present? Can we actually free our minds from the thought of ‘what next’..?Can we actually get a blank mind and soak it in today…live today to the fullest…

And then I read these lines…

"Work like you don't need money,

Love like you've never been hurt,

And dance like no one's watching."
--- Satchel Paige

This whole thought is fascinating and infectious….Could we detach ourselves from our expectation and fear that we might fall short of it – getting rewarded, getting loved back, getting a word of praise, and leave judgments aside and throw ourselves completely into something?

Work like you don’t need money….I wish I could do that :)….I really don’t have a hobby that would pay me anything but satisfaction. And we need to pay the bills ….But surely, one thing I have been missing is taking time out for in the recent years is my hobbies. Someone recently asked me what my hobbies were, and I had difficulty in putting my finger on one thing that I had actively pursued in the last 5 years…It was embarrassing and awkward….. But I had hobbies which I loved. I used to love sketching and painting, I danced for 10 straight years, I had a major liking for interior design that I almost studied it. Now my hobbies have degenerated into watching sitcoms, listening to music, window shopping and watching more sitcoms….The only worthwhile thing I have taken up more seriously of late is cooking. I have started to slow down and enjoying cooking instead of taking it as a task that I need to perfect. I have stopped relying on my 20 min rush recipes. I have started to observe the spices I use and the flavors they have, and have started to experiment with understanding (or so I believe!!). I bought myself a keyboard (casio) a year back in the hope that it will be my sweet diversion, my new hobby. I have yet to find time to take it as a serious pursuit…..

Hobbies make our life more fulfilling. Its something we enjoy, we don’t have any targets or expectations. Its our creative vent out and we can give ourselves as many chances we need to perfect it out, and there is no fear of failure (I don’t like the look on B’s face as I say this and cook…but never mind him…); Its working like you don’t need the money…

Love like you have never been hurt….If a past of hurt shadows ur emotion, you are just pulling back in defense. There should be no reservations in love, no preconditions, no fear. Don’t lock yourself up, Go with an open heart. Will I get hurt again; Yes, I may …but atleast I will know that I gave it my all. And there shall be no regrets.

And then there’s my favorite line..Dance like no one’s watching..
Observing young children teaches you one thing. They have no fear …of falling, of getting embarrassed, of trying new things. I have always had a hundred thoughts zipping in my head when I held a microphone and looked up at a room full of people. And yes, it took me blurting out “Good Evening everybody” a couple of times during bright early mornings and flashing a foolish giddy smile when I realize this and my many other bloopers to finally get comfortable standing over there.

Its that constant sense of “will I be able to keep this conversation interesting”, “will someone laugh if i told them a joke now”, “will I meet my own expectations” “Am I nervous and will it show” and “OMG, did everyone notice that I blurted something wrong”…….and It takes me a while before I get comfortable chattering away without watching (Sometimes, that hasn’t worked out so well…:) but still..). I have also learnt over the years that being able to laugh at ourselves is a skill that makes us feel less intimidated by the situation….So let go of inhibitions, don’t always seek approval, Dance away to express yourselves, like no one’s watching …. If someone see’s you falling flat on ur face, just smile back and it wont matter as much….

Sometimes we just need to slow down…. Scenic drives aren’t freeways, they are these windy roads telling people to slow down and watch around. And when we are stuck at a transit point in life by something we cant control, we need to drop the sense of urgency to be somewhere and live the moment… Spend some time to enjoy the little somethings of ur life.

Embracing Change.....

Resistance to change ...Starting from studying it in Newtons law to seeing it in everyday life, I have realized I dont respond well to change ...In things big and small...
I like holding on to my old jeans even if the hems are completely frayed, I dont like too many remixes to the original, I get very uncomfortable if someone adapts a classical song to a western tune, I like to find my stuff in the same place, I experiment with food within certain defined confines, repainting my room is a serious decision to take, I tend to notice and get concerned about small changes in the way people talk, I have always clinged onto anything dear till the point i had no choice but to let go. I even feel sad about throwing my first laptop which hardly boots up and shuts down every 5 min.

Recently i have been forced into a small change i dint so much desire...switching to Office 2007...For some vague reason, we had a mandatory switch to 2007. I lost my old templates, I was searching for options all the time, they have these disappearing panels, and making some changes on a graph seem more work. All of a sudden I am this rookie longing for that straightforward drop down options and trying to figure out a way to cope with this change. It was like having this cool gizmo which you can’t use. The appearance looks better...But won’t i understand the option "filter" without having to look at the funnel? My first panic call happened when what i usually take 15 min to complete was taking me an hour as I was playing this hide and seek with the different options. I called the IT folks who manage this stuff and asked "Is there any way to switch back to the older version?" and the reply was "No, it was a mandatory change"....

It was forced change..I couldn’t undo it. And I was suddenly able to empathize with the old mom's and dads who would wonder what was happening when the Digital TV switch happens and their old analog TV set screen blurs because they didn’t buy some box. I feel the same way about Office 2007.

I was reminded of my dad’s experience. He very much resisted getting absorbed into this Internet dominated world and the compulsion to keep up with this change swept through his life just 2 years before his retirement. And when he first started trying to get the hang of it all, he used to come and very seriously check with me "Would the email have reached by now" 2 days after sending it... :)

This small change also made me think about how I have dealt with change all the while. I like things where they are in most cases. It’s like a relationship of trust has been established. And if things change, it’s work to build it all over again. I like the constancy of the life and love. And though change by itself may be good or bad, it brings with itself a huge uncertainty, expectation and fear. Change however is a constant companion and I am constantly trying to establish my reference.

Change has been good several times too. Moving to a new city, getting married to someone I enjoyed being with, cutting my hair really short and trying to look at the mirror without laughing, wearing a real bright red sweater for the first time in more than 10 years and realizing it wasn’t that bad on me at all, trying to wear shorts and daring to walk past my door in it and also bringing myself to actually start writing stuff about myself in public domain.

Change is what drives us forward, helps us understand ourselves better and makes us stronger…Some are the changes that open up possibilities that excite us, some are the heartbreaking moments which we struggle with, some are the results of the conscious choices we have made and some have just swept us off our feet when we weren’t watching.

I am sure, a couple of weeks from now, my discomfort with this new version of Office would be gone…And something new will step in to challenge my sense of inertia.

“The future has a way of arriving unannounced.” – George Will

You have got mail ....

I hate checking my mails...not my emails...by now I have an addiction towards email that I check them every couple min..faster than they come in usually. I am talking about snail mails. B somehow dropped the habit of picking up the mail every weekend strangely synchronized with the fact that I was selecting our rental movie DVDs these days…

Anyhow, I pull out the innumerous grocery coupons, tire change and killer deal insurance options, all the 'to the resident' and 'to our neighbors' copy of grocery coupons and dating services (why do my neighbors love me so much) all stuffed into the narrow box, hoping that my blockbuster DVD isnt crushed and cracked in all this pressure, and tossed most of them out into the bin. Glad that I was done with this ordeal, I plop the remaining mail on the coffee table where it will rest till the next mail comes in and eventually get stowed away into my closet, when I am expecting visitors and finally die its death in my shredder unopened. If one of them were to come alive and write a tale of their life, it would be pretty sad....Anyhow, while I am mindlessly gazing at the TV watching around 4 shows at the same time , I chance to spot a handwritten name...my name ..on a letter...

Its been ages since I got a letter that was not a bill or statement or a credit card offer or a fine… on my name.

Well, it could be my dentist, he always sends these nice cards every season wishing you for the season and reminding you to come by and take care of his business and your teeth....But no, it was a letter, and from an old friend...who obviously didnt know how I treat my snail mail. Super excited and thrilled I pulled out the 2 sheets of the impeccably written letter.

It was refreshing that I dint have to re-read thru a bunch of acronyms and go ‘ahh-haan...now I get it’..She had used more or less complete sentences. It felt very nice that someone had sat down and taken the trouble of writing this long letter. Considering that my entire communication system had degenerated into one line emails, chat, orkut and facebook messages, this was eye opening into my own self. As a kid, I used to make my own cards...well partially bcos I couldnt afford to buy many cards on my pocket money, partially because I liked to do something different. Also, I believed I wanted to spend more time on a gift and hence I would end up stalking my best friends with hand made cards till they told me how much they liked it or if I liked them way too much I would give them hand made sketches and portraits I drew off magazine covers and rag them to hell as to who it looked like.

S used to write me letters through undergrad days, and that used to be great. He was pbly the only friend I have who has managed to hold on to everyone he knows even when email wasn’t around..So my letter writing days continued into undergrad years, thanks to him. Then with the access to email, everything died. With email, it has become a way of convenience to express our constant sense of urgency. I phased out from an e-card splurge to express myself (or rather the card’s own words) in college years to simple notes these days.
In all my enthusiasm, little knowing how linguistically dysfuntional I had become, I started to write a letter back.....and realized y I shouldnt be doing that ...

1) My handwriting used to look quite good during school days though you had to tilt your head through like 45 degrees and squint your eyes a bit for it to make sense, it used to fall under gravity...but very symmetrically so, and now its reduced to some drunk chicken scrawling. I couldn’t read my grocery list.

2) I also like to write as I speak...meaning I get verbose and get lost in my own tangled web of words. Not to mention the very unsettling fact that whenever I wrote long emails, I got the shortest of replies !!

3) My grammar is bad (honestly who cares about grammar or punctuation in emails anymore?)...And I have started using a "?" as a sole punctuation to differentiate between statements and questions apart from my inexplicable love for exclamations and extra period marks. I strongly suspect my inability to bring a statement to a logical conclusion to be the reason for leaving them in such suspension.

4) For some reason the apartment outbox is right over trash fueling my apprehensions that some of the mail will drop into the trash can unnoticed. So I never posted anything from there. Which later went down to ‘I never posted anything at all?’

5) I am bad at posting stuff. I finally paid up my copay at the hospital after 6 months, purely out of embarrassment that the only mail I was getting was a reminder from them.

6) They keep adding these 2c to the postage charge and I keep looking for those additional stamps.

7) I will convince myself that I am doing my part saving trees

8) Most of all ...I am lazy and at a total loss for words.

I opened my email, typed out a nice email with a lot of emoticons to help assemble my thought and sent it out...Better electronic than never.